Wednesday, January 8, 2014

This Week's Top 10s

Top 10 Songs:

10. RED EYES, The War On Drugs (2013)
9. MONKEY BUSINESS, Skid Row (1991)
8. FOR IT ALL NOW, Outernational (2013)
7. AFTERLIFE, Arcade Fire (2013)
6. RHYME OR REASON, Eminem (2013)
5. ORDINARY LOVE, U2 (2013)
4. HIGGS BOSON BLUES, Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds (2013)
3. BIG SHOT, The Pack A.D. (2013)
2. HIGH ROAD, Cults (2013)
1. DO WHAT U WANT, Lady Gaga (feat. Christina Aguilera) (2014)

Top 10 Cock Rock/Hair Metal Bands:

10. BON JOVI
9. EUROPE
8. TWISTED SISTER
7. YNGWIE MALMSTEEN
6. SLAUGHTER
5. SCORPIONS
4. KISS
3. L.A. GUNS
2. MÖTLEY CRÜE
1. SKID ROW

No, I didn't include Guns N' Roses, because despite the fact that they sprayed their hair in their very first video (Welcome To The Jungle) and hail from Los Angeles, they actually had balls, as opposed to those who had to wear spandex to show them. Bon Jovi only barely made the list because New Jersey is so good it should have been made by another band.

L.A. Guns gets top-3 consideration because The Ballad Of Jane is the quintessential ballad, and Kiss My Love Goodbye is the era's typical rocker - feats Skid Row also attain with I Remember You and Youth Gone Wild, with the addition of the quintessential power-ballad, 18 And Life. But Skid Row takes top spot because their sophomore effort, Slave To The Grind, improved their output quality by at least 200%. Mötley Crüe takes the silver medal home for sheer consistency, the quality of their Dr. Feelgood record, and for being able to milk decent hit songs from even average records.

Van Halen and Poison are where they should be - at home, crying.

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